16th October, 2016.. Yes it was yesterday and I was thinking of today as my age was to be incremented by one. On the verge of completing 25 years of my existence, I was wondering how different my life would have been if I had made the right choices. Choices would have made the life easy but certainly the experience factor would have taken a dent. Sudden introspection left me in a deep sleep before midnight and as the clock struck twelve, my phone rang. It is not anomaly for the phone to ring on the birthday. I lifted the phone and on the other side was someone with whom I have shared an esoteric relation which dates back to some 6 years when I used to teach her physics. She knew with my way of answering that I was asleep before twelve and would definitely had a glimpse of how non-happening my life has become.
After promising her to give a call tomorrow I responded to few messages that said the one and the same thing. As soon as I was about to put my phone away, one of my dear friend was on the other side of the call. All the introspection related to my job I made him listen, and such a gem of a person my friend is, he didn’t complain. I desperately needed some sleep and I found the same by putting my phone on silent mode.
As soon as I got up I had to do all the catching up with unanswered message and missed calls. Few replies resulted in conversation that lit up my mood. One such conversation was with someone with a beautiful heart and had the privilege of celebrating her birthday on a Friday night. She asked me about the plans that I had for celebrating the special day of life. I was thinking of answering in the most conventional way but telling her that I am not happy and not celebrating would have made her think otherwise. So I went the writer’s way and said the same with a twist, ‘A single guy, living in a remotest of place can’t have plans. My mother, father, Bhaiya and Bhabhi (latter 2 on skype) will sit and have a family conversation.’ It was better than saying nothing and killing the conversation. We may not have been the closest of friends but still her words have always left me smiling or have given a immense joy to my life. Monday Blues bought our conversation to a premature end and I was back on the celebrity mode and answered all the messages which required my acknowledgement for the sender not to feel offended or hurt by my rude behavior. I am a very unbiased when it comes to giving happiness, I responded to messages from exlovers with the same warmth with which I did to others, they must not feel that they made the wrong choice by giving a part of their life to me. I may not get the favors back but expecting things from people is perhaps what I don’t believe in.
In between all the voids of the day, I resorted to beautiful memories associated with the day. Few years back when I thought I was with my better half, there were handmade gifts and cakes which summed up my day. When I was at my alma mater birthday bums formed the bulk of the memories. But I could remember one special birthday where my hope and belief came true. I received something from a very special person who holds many meanings in my life. It was the last birthday and memories are still fresh of that special day. As soon as I was about to take a ride into that day decorated with memories of her efforts to make me feel special, my phone rang. Reading the initials I couldn’t believe my eyes, it was a call from the same person of whom I was thinking about.
I answered it with all the warmth and with a gesture that was enough to convey my joy to her ears. Over joyed and excited I sensed something surreal in the world. Her way of saying ‘Avijit’ drowns me in the emotions that I could hardly mew about. Talking to her I discovered that distance means nothing when the bond is pure and permanent as a mole. She hasn’t changed and words still needed to be priced out of her. All the while I was like a book waiting to be read by someone who started it with her words but left in between to experience life. She listened to all my highs and tried to pacify all my sorrows. Speaking to her just took me to cloud nine and somehow her effect just got the best out of me. I told her about my feelings when I received her gift the last time around and while reciting my words I could sense that she was wondering about the gift for this year. As soon as she could say anything, I said THANK YOU. She asked me the reason and I said, ‘this thank you is for the gift that you gave me by sparing your time and giving me your words.’ It was not a flattery as there are only a few who stick to you in the worst of times and she not only stood beside me but also made me recover. She said that I reserve the best words for her and I said for others I write or speak words but for you these words have always been emotions. I never wanted to hang up my phone but already crossed conversation already crossed the hour mark so I decided to break my flow of words.
I may have received many gifts on the day but the part that mattered was the fulfilling conversation that I had with the zahir of my life was certainly the thing which will be the memoir for this birthday. I have turned 25 and certainly on the wrong side of twenties but with a heart which has words in the form of emotions imbibed in it. I have received wishes in plenty on this day, some may have forgotten to wish me but as I say some people don’t need an occasion to wish me as their wishes are always with me